Wednesday, July 28, 2010

On Headphones


It really is a stupid design to have a set which goes over your head with a cable which runs past your chin. The natural tendency is of course to chew on the cable, since it’s right there. I don’t know how many sets of headphones I have destroyed in my life. I have a draw in my desk which contains several tangled up chewed through cables which are covered in various degrees of solder, cello tape and connection plates in some attempt to get them functioning again. These cables really should have a steel armour or something around them.

Although I do dread the day that wireless headphones of high quality become commonplace. I can only imagine what I’ll start chewing in place of cables...
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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

On Not Being Careful What You Wish For


An overly athletic nose seems to be a consistent problem in July which I almost managed to hold off for this year. I’ve had a mild ear infection for the last couple of weeks, and it seems its finally managed to work its way into my sinuses. The only problem is that it didn’t come running out like it usually does. As a direct result, my entire face felt like it had been stuffed like a Christmas turkey. All I wished for was for my nose to run so that I could clear it out.

Needless to say, my wish came true – my nose is running... a lot. It is annoying to have to blow your nose every ten minutes, and the worst part is that my face still feels like the Christmas turkey (although I’m not going to be tricked into thinking it might taste like stuffing, so don’t even try that). Now I’m just wishing that I will get better soon, but the universe doesn’t grant wishes that often. Oh well, I guess it’s just been a normal July...

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Friday, July 23, 2010

On the Valve to Spout Ratio...


... in taps, particularly. And which may be one or two, depending on the bath/basin/sink layout, design and relative laziness of the plumber who did the installation. The ratio has little importance in a bath, since the water mixes anyway. It is also of little significance if there is only a single valve (as any additional spouts would be redundant), but in the case of separate hot and cold taps on a sink or basin, the ratio should in all cases, without exception, be 2:1.

Unfortunately, in all of the basins I regularly encounter, there is a 1:1 ratio of taps to spouts. If you need to wash your hands quickly, it is impractical to fill the basin (not to mention that filling the basin wastes water). Thus, holding your hands under the tap becomes the most practical solution. The problem with having a 1:1 valve to spout ratio with separate hot and cold valves is that no mixing would take place. The water from the hot spout is too hot, and water from the cold spout is too cold. My solution to this is often to have both taps on and dart between the hot and cold streams. This is an unnecessary waste of water that would be solved so easily by increasing the valve to spout ratio.

Conservation of water should be our number one priority. If we’re not careful, the penguins will have solidified all of it in their Antarctic ice factories and we will have none.

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

On Pretty Much Nothing


Um... Yeah. So, well... Nice weather we've been having... Er... yeah.

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On Even More Nonsensical Gibberish than Usual


Which is all it is these days, really, and I promise to bring you more of it. I’m not talking about this in particular – I’m talking about absolutely everything everyone says (not only celebrities, politicians and news readers, because they only started the trend). Actually, that’s an unfair statement, considering that none of it is really nonsensical (at least on some superficial surface level) and that very little of it is actually gibberish (except for some of the jargon some people tend to use because they think it makes them seem smarter, but it only results in vacant expressions and the occasional yawn). It’s just that it might as well be, with the things that go through people’s heads.

I’ve heard people refer to humans as an “advanced species” so many times, it’s now annoying. They cite our technological and scientific achievements as evidence for this: things like cloning, space travel, the internet, our global transport network and the like. The truth is that human’s are actually pretty pathetic. I’ve touched before on why I believe it was a four year old boy who discovered bread, and how it was a retarded kid who discovered fire. This is pretty much just more of the same ranting and whining on pretty much the same topic, but from a much more modern perspective, so you can probably just stop reading now if you didn’t like the last two whines on this topic.

Seriously though, can any of those major scientific advancements be attributed to the human race? Surely the credit is only due to a small group of individuals. For example, how many people do you know who can build a relatively simple device like a microwave, or something as fundamental to our age as an internal combustion engine. If I took a sample of, say, twenty “average” humans of good mental and physical health and working age, from a variety of backgrounds, put them in an isolated room with unlimited access to basic raw materials, and asked them to build a basic television set, or a rocket capable of deploying a satellite in orbit (which is far simpler than the television set, in my opinion), would they be able to do it?

And that is pretty much all I had to say, except for the even more nonsensical gibberish that I promised you. Because garbleshlarve in wiglabashaver isen dashrioclabber esquoobleo nas flabbergeelo ons kuelliamp ondaes shlay.

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